Um, how do I say this....

... oh, I'm no longer single.

Whew! There. I said it.
So I happened to meet this guy online at the end of July and we just HIT it off for some reason. We chatted online everyday (still do, in fact) then we decided to meet IRL. The first meeting happened over Labor Day weekend.

We had fun watching movies, listening to music and getting to know each other in real life.

Despite my frazzled nerves, there was still a connection with our face to face meeting, and after some discussion, we decided to date each other exclusively.

I'm still taking it slow, because I have A LOT of fear when it comes to relationships. Fear of getting hurt, fear of hurting someone else, fear of abandonment, etc... Let's just sum it up by saying I have issues. Gah, I hate admitting things like that.... makes me feel so, um, human.

Anyway, school is about to start in just over a week. Still gotta iron out my schedule and figure out the book situation. Oh, and mentally prepare for giving up the sad little social life that I've celebrated over the past few months.

Oh, you want to know about my boyfriend? His name is Matt, he's two years younger than me, he is into metal, playing guitar, video games, movies... oh, and me. :D He lives in Vancouver, WA.

He and I are crazy in sync and often say the same things at the same time. We are close in age which makes it fun when we make pop culture references. :D

Most importantly, he gets me. Oh, and I get him, too. That part of this whole this is really new, different, mindblowing, astonishing and well, pretty stellar.

We are in the relationship infancy where everything is so sweet and sappy. We already have lots of inside jokes... just between us. :D

So anyway, just wish me (us) luck.

Love is a battlefield....

Ten Songs I Love

Ten Songs I Love:

Van Halen - Ain't Talkin' Bout Love
Snow Patrol - Chasing Cars
Alice In Chains - Don't Follow
Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here
Frank Black - I Burn Today
Smashing Pumpkins - 33
Offspring - Stuff Is Messed Up
Seether - Fake It
Drowning Pool - 37 Stitches
Beck - Cold Brains

Another reason I'm single...

Like I needed another reason NOT to get involved with someone:

So a while ago, this guy and I were exchanging emails on POF (dating website). He was all about the phone and I'm just not that into chatting with some complete stranger (I'm shy). He said, "well, you can text if you want." So cool, I don't really want to randomly text or chat on the phone with anyone, with one exception: if they can carry on an interesting conversation. If it's lame or boring, I don't really want to waste my texts.

So I get a message from him this morning. He sent it at 1am, so of course, even though I was up at that time (trying to fall asleep), I didn't get the text until this morning. I'll disguise his identity a bit:

I check my phone text messages and it just says: "Its b***y how r u doing?" (keep in mind he hasn't messaged me on POF for over 1 week)
I respond: "hi there, b***y. it's rachael. i'm fine, how are you?"
His response: "Im doing fine myself u should send me some pics."
My response: "I should send some pics? pics of what?"
His response: "Pics of u."
I don't respond, but after a while he does: "So that's a no."
My response: "Why do you need pics of me? U know what I look like, right? I have pics online. I don't much feel like being photographed 2day." (The online pics I'm referring to are my POF profile pics)
Hi response: "it's nothing wrong wtih having pics of a person." (this just doesn't even make sense!)
My response: "I understand what u r saying." (This is a lie, I do not understand what he is saying.)
His response: "Ok, it's cool" (I did not respond to this.)

You can't break a heart and have it

Wow.  I was really getting good at blogging there for like, a minute.  Oh well, reality sets in and you have to get back to real life.  Which for me means, work, playing in my scrap stuff and doing stuff with my friends.  Oh, and walking... lots of walking.  I do feel the need to cram as much fun stuff into my summer as possible.  I know it's gonna end soon and I'll be back to my previous work-and- school-work-and-no-fun-stuff routine.

Last night my friends and I checked out Black Francis (AKA Frank Black) at the Aladdin Theater.  It's a sweet venue, because it's tiny and intimate.  Jen and I arrived early and saved seats for our friends.  I swear we were about 20 feet from Frank.  A few rows from the front, right in the center.  

The show was good.  I'm glad I went.  I had camera phone envy because the boys in front of us  had really cool phones that took really good photos.  I did take a pic with my phone, but I can't find my micro SD card adapter.  Oh well... the pic might not have been good anyway.  

So, I'm back on the blog for now.  We'll see how long this episode lasts.

More books...

I just finished reading The Wedding, by Nicholas Sparks.  I was loaned this book by my boss.  She wants it returned, so against my better judgement, I read it.  I say, "against my better judgement" becasue I have read Sparks' books before.  They are pure works of fiction.  In my experience, real life doesn't happen at all the way his books are written.  I think I like real life, but I do take something from his books.  I do like a little bit of fantasy in my life... 

I did find a couple of quotes that I really liked from this book.  

"But love, I've discovered, is more than three words mumbled before bedtime.  Love is sustained by action, a pattern of devotion in the things we do for each other every day."

"Yes, I decided, a man can truly change."

Death...

This past week, I got news that a woman at work suffered an incredible loss on the 4th of July.  Wendy is my coworker, Max is her grandson.  In september, Max's parent's (Wendy's son and daughter-in-law) took him to the doctor, to get him checked out after noticing something was off about him.  After extensive testing, they found out he had brainstem glioma (Information I found on the interwebs about this: Brainstem gliomas are tumors that occur in the region of the brain referred to as the brain stem, which is the area between the aqueduct of Sylvius and the fourth ventricle.)  He underwent treatment, and there was hope for a short while.  However, on the fourth of July, Max passed away.  Six years old.  I don't know Max or his family personally, but I do know Wendy.  Wendy approached me this past spring and asked me to create two scrapbooks for her to give as gifts to Leanne, her daughter-in-law..  One for Max's sister, Addie, and one for Max.  I worked my tail off creating these albums.  I created pages and left spaces for journaling and photos.  It was a fun project.  Except I admit, I struggled while making Max's pages.  I knew he was sick and this affected my creativity.  I powered through, which is what I do.  At the last minute, I finished the books and delivered them to Wendy who carried them with her on the plane to visit Max and his family.  Leanne loved the books and said "they are beautiful and perfect" and also asked if I could make more for her to give others as gifts.  Of course, I can.  It's what I do, after all.

I'm going to post a couple of my faves from Addie and Max's albums:

reading and life...

I just finished this book.  I really like it.  I always find quotes in everything I read.  Here are my favorites from this Good In Bed:

"You don't have to do everything alone," he said. "There are people who care about you.  You just have to let them help."

"Help," I said again, as if I were a baby, as if this was a word I'd just learned and could not stop repeating. "Help me.  Help."

These quotes remind me so much of what someone might say to me.  I never let anyone help me, I have resigned myself to doing everything alone.  

This grand jury experience has been frightening.  It's truly opened my eyes to so much.  I am disbelieving at the amount of crime that happens in my city... when the DA says that the crime rate is down, I don't see how.  My response has been to hang out at home much more than I used to.  Opting for doing something at home rather than going out somewhere public.

Anyway, that's enough depressive chatter, but that gives you an insight to what's been running through my brain these days.  I can't wait until I can return to work.  I only have one week left of grand jury duty.  Woohoo!

I've been scrapping a bit and have to scan some pages, but will wait till I'm all the way done (some of the pages need finishing touches).  Will post them later.

I skipped out on July 4th celebrations this year.  I scrapped at home instead.  I was invited to a couple of celebrations, but don't want to do stuff alone lately (so OVER being "that" girl).

I have recently started two new "online dating" profiles, but am too chicken to meet anyone IRL.  Which is no big deal, because no one has approached me or messaged me or anything.  I will only have time for "dating" over the summer, but looks like that's not really going to happen, so I'll just use that time to scrap instead.  :D